Three Kitty Konstruction

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Planning Phase: July, 2000 - Feb., 2002

Building Phase: Mar., 2002 - Oct., 2003

Finishing Up: October, 2003 -

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October, 2003

Editor's Note: Our move to Point Arena consisted of several stages. Stage one was at the end of June (Day 483) when about half of our possessions (about 16,000 U.S. pounds) were packed into two moving vans and moved into the Barn at the new house. Stage two was early in the third week of July (Day 508) when we rented a small truck and moved our houseplants, our orchid collection and our aquarium fish. The plants and orchids went into a clearing in the woods and the fish went into a small aquarium that we had previously set up in the basement of the new house. Stage three was the end of that week (Day 512) when our furniture and the rest of our possessions (total weight, another 16,000 U.S. pounds) were moved into the new house. Stage four was five days (Day 517) later when the three kitties moved north.

Despite all assurances (even as late as April), the new house was not complete when the Three Kitty Kompany set up its new corporate headquarters in Point Arena. The biggest challenge was the bath facilities. The shower and tub were finished in the bathroom on the second floor. The toilet and sink were on the first floor. As the following weeks progressed, this situation changed with final completion of all bathrooms 10 weeks later, early in October.

Along with the incomplete bathrooms, the kitchen and front hall floors had only the sub-floor for a surface. Consequently, the baseboards in those areas also were not installed. The cabinets in the kitchen, laundry, dining room and butler's pantry were not complete. The bookshelves in the library and the cabinetry in the living room were completely absent. There were no sidewalks, no screens in the screen porch and the patio, front porch, sunroom were far from finished.

On October 24, Day 603, the construction project was completed and the only remaining items were those on the "punch list" - the list of items to be repainted, repaired, reinstalled or replaced.

In order to maintain correspondence with family and friends, many of whom have similar construction stories to tell, the Three Kitty Kompany gave birth to a new subsidiary, Three Kitty (war) Korrespondents. As part of the Korrespondents group, the kitties reported periodically from various battle fields of the construction war. Below are excerpts from their reports.

Anyone who has ever lived in a home that was "under construction" will understand the "tongue-in-cheek" humor found in the communiques below. In summary, we are very happy with our new home. It's quality of construction and its finish are phenominal. Our relationships with both the architect and builder are strong and we are honored to have each as a friend.

Battle News Parts 1-10

Battle News Parts 11-20

Battle News Part 21-30

NEWS FROM THE (CONSTRUCTION) BATTLE FRONT - PARTS 1 to 10

Day 537 - Part 1
FLASH!! DATELINE: POINT ARENA, CA; 19 AUGUST, 11:00AM
The latest events in the on-going construction war brought a major set-back to the Allied Forces of the 3 Kitty Kompany. The undercounter refrigerator, scheduled to hold soft drinks (in the butler's pantry) for parched humans, doesn't fit the alcove built for it. Currently, the contractor's forces are regrouping for a new assault perhaps involving demolition and rebuilding of part of a wall.

The Tilesetter Tank Corps is grouting the kitchen so the humans will be eating out again tonight. We're scheduled for a concrete pour of the sidewalks and the rest of the hot-tub pad this morning. We hope today gets better. Maybe the gods of plumbers will grant us a second toilet or the gods of cabinetry will grant us some bookcases or the rest of the kitchen cabinets. We haven't seen either of those sub-contractors for 3 weeks and have forgotten what they look like.

More [dust] to follow ... Stay tuned to these 3 Kitty stations.

Part 2
FLASH!! DATELINE: POINT ARENA, CA; 19 AUGUST, 4:43PM
Great news!! The forces of the Three Kitty Kompany have beaten back the previous advance of the evil empire and the remodelling of the butler's pantry wall has been averted. Only through the quick thinking of our Own General Contractor was the balance tipped toward the Feline Forces.

The Feline Forces also made significant advances today against the minions of mud and dust in the installation of concrete sidewalks from the driveway to the house (2 locations) and from the house to the barn. However, the forces of mud and dust could possibly make one more incursion as the sidewalks will not be combat ready for at least a day.

On the kitchen floor front, the battle rages with an end in sight tomorrow. Then it is on to the master bathroom.

Still no sign of reinforcements from the Plumbing Platoon or the Cabinetry Cavalry.

Until tomorrow, your Three Kitty (war) Korrespondents, Blackie, Yoda and Wookie.

Day 538 - Part 3
FLASH!! DATELINE: POINT ARENA, CA; 20 AUGUST, 3:55PM
The Plumbing Platoon arrived this noon and are hard at battle with several of the ceramic gods in the bathrooms. Thus they have given the Three Kitty Kompany a somewhat flushing victory today. However, for reasons that evade even the brightest of the Three Kitty strategists, our second floor bathroom (where we find the only shower and bathtub in the house), still has only half a toilet. On a second front, there is still some bobbing and weaving from the ranks of the Plumbing Platoon as to the availability of the specified fixtures for the master bath. This is disputed territory that has been the scene of battles twice before. Stay tuned on this one; there may be a pitched battle yet.

The Cretinous Cabinet Cavalry has delayed their arrival on the scene until Friday. This delaying tactic may be related to the activity in the kitchen where once again the Tilesetter Tank Corps are working on the floor. Today the grout is being sealed and "Everybody's gonna get stoned." from the organic solvents.

Elements of the Electrician's Epaulets have finally shed light on the outside of the barn and the garage as good bulbs were installed. Also, enlightenment has occurred under the kitchen cabinets and in the laundry room and mud room, significantly raising the morale of the Three Kitty troops.

The forces of evil are being rapidly overwhelmed by the Electrican's Epaulets as the installation of the hot tub progresses. Decking is still needed before final victory can be declared in this theater, but as of this writing, the tide of battle on this front is definitely in favor of the Three Kitty forces as the water rises and the tub fills.

Until next time, your Three Kitty (war) Korrespondents, Blackie, Yoda and Wookie.

Day 540 - Part 4
FLASH!! DATELINE: POINT ARENA, CA; 22 AUGUST, 4:35PM
The Allied Forces of the Three Kitty Kompany and the evil empire once again are doing battle on several fronts: The Pitiful Plumbing Platoon installed the second half of the upstairs toilet yesterday and corrected errors in faucet installation in the kitchen island and the butler's pantry. They made major strides toward victory with the water treatment system, fixing a leak and, at the same time, correcting an engineering problem that prohibited changing the uv light bulb in the sanitizer. To do this, however, they had to send water from the well directly into the house. The Pitiful Plumbing Platoon promised prompt return on Friday afternoon. Also promised for Friday was the installation of the sink in the guest suite (giving the Three Kitty forces a full bath - but with no hot water yet) and installation of the sink in the laundry room. Alas, the forces of evil and chaos completely overwhelmed the Pitiful Plumbing Platoon and their return was not to be. Reinforcements are being sought.

The Elegant Electrician's Epaulets completely defeated the enemy at the site of the hot tub and installation was successful. The tub is full and the water is hot. The Crazy Chemistry Contingent is still trying to get the water quality correct. Stay tuned and watch out for a core melt down.

The Cruel, Cretinous Cabinetry Cavalry once again were "in absentia". So there is no progress in the battle between the Three Kitty heros and the billions of bountiful boxes supported by their comrades the disorganized, dishevelled drawers and constantly cluttered cabinets.

The Talented Tilesetter Tank Corps haven't been seen in two days. The battle for the kitchen/laundry/family room floor isn't over and victory can't be declared as the grout for the high-traffic area in the laundry room has yet to be sealed. We fear for the well-being of our talented Tankers. This will definitely delay any progress in the battles for the master bath or the front entry.

The good news is that the forces of chaos were pushed back today by Our Carpentry Heros who moved the freezer into the pantry and the television from the office to its home in the family room. One carpenter was heard to ask if the weighty television was a Bradley Fighting Television. Also, the linen closets were completed and turned over to Allied Forces who, in an attempt to smother any attempted counter-attack, immediately occupied them with blankets, pillows, towels and quilts.

Until next time, your Three Kitty war correspondents, Blackie, Yoda and Wookie.

Day 543 - Part 5
FLASH!! DATELINE: POINT ARENA, CA; 25 AUGUST, 2:54PM
It is difficult to judge progress today in the on-going conflict between the Allied Forces of the Three Kitty Kompany and the forces of evil, chaos, confusion and dust. The warm weather is taking its toll on the brave soldiers of both sides. But the Allied Forces seem to suffer more from the blazing sun and the temperatures between 75 and 80.

The Pitiful Plumbing Platoon returned this morning to announce that one of the most dependable tools of battle, the garbage disposal, does not fit under the extra-large sink in the laundry room. A smaller version of this most trusted tool must be ordered. In the interim, the forces of chaos have taken over the laundry room with cabinet doors removed and plumbing parts covering the battle field floor. In the garage, a similar fate met the Feline Forces and only partial installation was accomplished of the utility sink. Once again, plumbing parts have been found in a several foot radius around the battle site.

Now the battle rages in the guest suite where the forces of evil have forced our Plumbing Platoon to work on the new carpet, a full 10 steps closer than the concrete floor of the garage. It is too early to tell if the Plumbing Platoon will survive this latest incursion of evil and lapse of sanity. More later ...

The Cheerless, Cruel, Cretinous Cabinetry Cavalry are about to be declared MIA. We can only hope that they will appear on a list of POW's and can be exchanged at some point in the future for a good dirt smudge or a coating of dust (who are now prisoners of the Allied Forces - undergoing questioning in the 3 Kitty Korporate Headquarters) before the victorious vacuum cleaner returns to service.

Alas, the Tentative, Talented Tilesetter Tank Corps is also MIA. The Allied Forces' Own General Contractor is investigating their disappearance and, hopefully, will have good news later this week. Meanwhile, the supply lines to the Allied Forces are being reestablished. The undaunted UPS and the ferocious FedEx drivers have both found the current location of the 3 Kitty Headquarters and have successfully negotiated the 800 foot long driveway. Also, the phenomenal pharmer's market was phound on Saturday. It is located in neutral territory, in Gualala. Various vegetables of very good value were procured for use in the officer's mess.

Until tomorrow, your Three Kitty (war) Korrespondents, Blackie, Yoda and Wookie.

Day 544 - Part 6
FLASH!! DATELINE: POINT ARENA, CA; 26 AUGUST, 8:31PM
The Fearless Feline Forces were dealt a major setback today as our own General Contractor announced that the fateful fabricator (of the Corian countertop for the second floor guest bath) had been brainwashed by the forces of chaos and had cut the countertop incorrectly. Also, as an example of the complete power of the evil forces over the faint and fearful, he had been fabricating the wrong color material. The decision was made with some trepidation to tile the countertop if the Tedious, Tentative, Talented, Tilesetter Tank Corps is up to the assignment.

A second setback, albeit of a lesser nature, was dealt the 3 Kitty Korps as the faulty check valve in the heating system for the Three Kitty Korporate Headquarters could not be replaced by the Plumbing Platoon as the wrong part had been obtained. So, yes, the heat is on - even when it is over 80 degrees in the bedrooms. More on this later.

The Plumbing Platoon made some progress against the energetic evil empire today as two incorrectly installed faucets were repaired and the incorrect connectors for a third were identified. With a return tomorrow, the Plumbing Platoon could score a long-fought victory for sink installation. There soon will be, however, some intense negotiation between the Plumbing Platoon and the Tedious, Tentative, Talented, Tilesetter Tank Corps as to who will first face the forces of evil, chaos, and delay in the master bath.

The Counterproductive, Cheerless, Cruel, Cretinous Cabinetry Cavalry are indeed MIA. Our Own General Contractor contacted our enemy's headquarters in a vain attempt to obtain information about our courageous companions. There was also no word from the evil empire on the fate of our Tedious, Tentative, Talented, Tilesetter Tank Corps.

Despite the spate of bad news coming from several fronts, our Carpentry Heros made major progress toward complete victory with installation of decking around the hot tub. Victory on this front is expected early tomorrow. Also, a victory at the woodshed will soon be in hand with the application of paint. On a third battlefront, preparations were being made this morning to engage chaos,evil and the archvillian disarray at the very door of the Three Kitty Kompany Headquarters. Our Carpentry Heros are preparing to stand firm as the front porch pillars are enhanced with their finish material. Alas, the company commander of our Carpentry Heros spent his last day with us today as he is marching on to bigger battles under a different General (Contractor). We wish him well.

Until tomorrow, your Three Kitty (war) Korrespondents, Blackie, Yoda and Wookie.

Day 545 - Part 7
FLASH!! DATELINE: POINT ARENA, CA; 27 AUGUST, 1:36PM
The Pitiful Plumbing Platoon is officially AWOL today with their absence from the scene of a battle with the denizens of dirt, dust and grime at the utility sink in the garage (not to mention their battles with heat horror in the master bedrooms and the lack of horrifying heated hydro in the homey hovel (the guest suite). If their absence continues through the day today and into tomorrow, the MP's will be notified and our Own General Contractor will be asked to lead the search. We all hope they haven't succumbed to the dark side of the force.

The Cheerless, Cruel, Cretinous Cabinetry Cavalry returned from their temporary billet deep in enemy territory where they were on a top secret mission for another army. The glass panel was finally placed in the dining room cabinet thus soundly defeating dust and chaos at this location. Measurements were taken in the kitchen for cabinets. A potential pitfall is looming as the glass doors for the dish cabinet will require a special tactical weapon (read that a special order fitting) that is not yet specified. This battle has the potential to drag on for some time yet. The Cretinous Cavalry did precariously promise a more prompt pace to produce a pittance of progress as they fight the clout and control of clutter and confusion. One casualty of the current cause of the Cheerless, Cruel, Cretinous Cabinetry Cavalry was a kitchen cabinet door, which, after being shaved and adjusted, spent several hours recuperating and refinishing thus allowing the minions of mud and dust to attack innocent poor, civilian Tupperware it previously protected.

While at the Three Kitty Korps Headquarters, the Cheerless, Cruel, Cretinous Cabinetry Cavalry took a moment to take measurements in advance of their battles in the butler's pantry, living room (in two places) and in the library. Dates for these battles cannot even be estimated. But the Allied Forces and their civilian "groupies" were comforted by the very presence of our chivalrous yet Cheerless, Cruel and Cretinous Cavalry.

As noted in our previous reports, the Tiresome, Tedious, Tentative, Talented, Tilesetter Tank Corps are still MIA. Our Own General Contractor has decided to personally venture into hostile territory at a battleground held by some other General (contractor) to locate our Tankers and inquire as to their fate. Negotiations can then begin for their release or exchange. The Feline Forces are still holding huge volumes of dust, dirt and chaos at the Korporate Headquarters in the slim hope of arranging a ransom.

The newest member of the Three Kitty Allied Forces arrived on the scene this afternoon - the Staff Sergeant of Screens. Measurements were taken and a battle plan was devised to finally enclose the screen porch. Dates for this battle against the wealth and weight of wind and weather have yet to be set.

The battle for the very front porch of the Three Kitty Korps Headquarters began today - slightly ahead of schedule - thus delaying the completion of the battle of the hot tub. The Crazy Chemistry Contingent has declared the hot tub battlefield safe for the civilian population to occupy as soon as our Carpentry Heros have finished their mop up operation.

Meanwhile, our Carpentry Heros toil on at both the front porch and the wood shed battle sites. Progress against chaos, evil and the archvillain disarray is steady. The Fearless Feline Forces should be able to declare victory at the wood shed shortly with the front porch following thereafter.

On a separate front, our Own General Contractor will be calling on the Bomber Battalion for reinforcements in the fracus to fix a frotzed, funky propane-fueled fireplace in our friendly fortress (the guest suite). More on that later. The battle lines are currently being drawn and top secret battle plans are being submitted.

All in all, it was a busy day on the (construction) battle front. The Fearless Feline Forces won a little and lost a little.

Until tomorrow, your Three Kitty (war) Korrespondents, Blackie, Yoda and Wookie.

Day 546 - Part 8
FLASH!! DATELINE: POINT ARENA, CA; 28 AUGUST, 4:01PM
Late yesterday, the utterly unassuming and unprotected utility closet once again fell into the hands of the weird, woeful and witless wrongdoers. The helpful hangers of colorful coats, junky jackets and sassy sweatshirts couldn't be hung because the hanging bar had been installed incorrectly. The good news of the day is that our Carpentry Heros declared victory in the battle for the wood shed. Immediately thereafter the full force of our fearless feline carpentry heros was devoted to the battle of the columns on the front porch. Progress, although slow is steady.

Our Own General Contractor ventured into hostile territory today to confront the enemy forces and negotiate the release of the Terrified, Tiresome, Tedious, Tentative, Talented, Tilesetter Tank Corps who are still MIA and assumed captured. Before venturing into hostile territory, our Own General Contractor also investigated the absence of the Peripatetic Pitiful Plumbing Platoon. The results of his investigation have not been reported back to the Feline Headquarters.

The Cruel, Cretinous Cabinetry Cavalry returned today to engage the forces of chaos and confusion with the installation of a towel bar in the kitchen. Now the Feline Forces can face the frothy front of fastidiousness with a fully fluffed, thick thirsty terricloth textile towel.

Until tomorrow, your Three Kitty (war) Korrespondents, Blackie, Yoda and Wookie.

Day 547 - Part 9
FLASH!! DATELINE: POINT ARENA, CA; 29 AUGUST, 8:13PM
Just before dinner yesterday, the Fearless Feline Forces were visited by the local USO group. The dynamic duo of Dorothy and Derek Deer delighted all with their dancing and their daring and determined deeds as they dined on and munched away at the delicacy of the local huckleberries.

Just after dinner today, your Three Kitty (war) Korrespondent Wookie and his human companions started down a footpath into the foreign, feisty and frequently ferocious forest. After about half an hour, a trail was taken that took the trio to the famous footpath for the Feline Fortress. Just before safety was secured, the tremendous trio was stopped and surprised by a squad of spotted sillies (the dogs who will eventually be our neighbors). One human bellowed bellicosely and belligerently while the other human whisked woeful Wookie. The spotted sillies slunk southward and your Three Kitty (war) korrespondents and companions continued uneventfully to the Feline Fortress - unharmed with a good story to tell Yoda and Blackie.

In the on-going battle with the forces of chaos, evil, dust and disarray, there was slight progress as our Carpentry Heros declared victory against the weird, woeful and witless wrongdoers once again at the utility closet. To seal the victory, the Feline Forces immediately hung those helpful hangers of colorful coats, junky jackets and sassy sweatshirts.

A major win was witnessed by our Carpentry Heros as the paper holder and the towel rings were hung in the front powder room. Medicine chests were also installed in both the front and laundry powder rooms. Dust did manage, however, to leave its leftovers in both locations for some lonesome life form to launder.

Our Own General Contractor returned today from his excursion into the enemy camp with his hopes of locating the Tenacious, Terrified, Tiresome, Tedious, Tentative, Talented, Tilesetter Tank Corps totally trashed. Alas, there was evidence that our trusty Tankers had been at the enemy location but they were personally unseen. The contra commander commented that he also considers the Corps to be completely courseless as he also is seeking their countenance (In other words, although their tools were at the site the other contractor didn't know where the tilesetters were either.) Our Own General Contractor is making preparations to declare the Tilesetter Tank Corps a casualty of war and seek replacements. Stay tuned, there will be more on this later.

As is becoming the norm, the Pernicious, Peripatetic, Pitiful Plumbing Platoon and the Cheerless, Cruel, Cretinous Cabinetry Cavalry were not to be found at the Feline Fortress today. The Cretinous Cavalry may be on yet another top secret mission in a remote camp making preparations and developing munitions to help defeat dasterdly duo of dust and chaos. The Allied Feline Forces will only know if the Cavalry has succeeded when they bring those weapons (read that, the cabinets) to the Feline Fortress.

The Pitiful Plumbing Platoon, on the other hand, is ???

Until next week, your Three Kitty (war) Korrespondents, Blackie, Yoda and Wookie.

Day 550 - Part 10
FLASH!! DATELINE: POINT ARENA, CA; 01 SEPTEMBER, 9:29PM
Our Carpentry Heros took leave from the war today in honor of the Labor Day holiday. Our Own General Contractor did journey to the Three Kitty Kompany Korporate Headquarters to did some touch-up painting and some cleaning of the battle stains left in the aftermath of assorted, accomplished, ascendant altercations thereby effectively ending with the evil eyesores escaping our everyday environment.

Also today, the Three Kitty Korps Headquarters was visited by yet another alternate army of the Allied Armed Forces. The Gutter Garrison graciously galloped to the vicinity of our very vital venue to plan the process, procedure and performance to deal with diverse drips, drops and downpours. This battle is scheduled to be fought in the fastest future fortnight.

Until tomorrow, your Three Kitty (war) Korrespondents, Blackie, Yoda and Wookie.

NEWS FROM THE (CONSTRUCTION) BATTLE FRONT - PARTS 11 to 20

Day 551 - Part 11
FLASH!! DATELINE: POINT ARENA, CA; 02 SEPTEMBER, 9:31PM
Today was yet another quiet day as our Carpentry Heros put the finishing flourishes on the facade of the Fearless Feline Fortress. When some additional armament arrives they will return rightly and rapidly to revisit our robust refuge and revetments.

Our Own General Contractor reported to sick call this morning after swallowing some singularly superb and sumptuous but sorrowfully spoiled shrimp. We hope for his return tomorrow.

The Peevish, Pernicious, Peripatetic, Pitiful Plumbing Platoon, the Causeless, Cheerless, Cruel, Cretinous Cabinetry Cavalry and the Tumultuous, Tenacious, Terrified, Tiresome, Tedious, Tentative, Talented, Tilesetter tTank Corps were all missing from the Feline Fortress and totally unaccounted for. This is kausing koncern in the Kitty Korps.

Until tomorrow, your Three Kitty (war) Korrespondents, Blackie, Yoda and Wookie.

Day 552 - Part 12
FLASH!! DATELINE: POINT ARENA, CA; 03 SEPTEMBER, 8:51PM
Our Carpentry Heros were off today on a top secret mission to assist and augment at another abode under assembly. They will return tomorrow. In the interim, the Pernicious, Peripatetic, Pitiful Plumbing Platoon purposefully popped in and pulled the plug on a plethera of previously postponed projects. (In other words, they worked on a number of things.) On one occasion, one of the plumbing first lieutenants announced that he had turned back on the water in the house. Immediately it began raining outside. We asked how that was done and the plumbing commander just smiled.

Our Own General Contractor pitched in and placed the pot rack perfectly parallel to the kitchen island.

Until next time, your Three Kitty (war) Korrespondents, Blackie, Yoda and Wookie.

Day 558 - Part 13
FLASH!! DATELINE: POINT ARENA, CA; 09 SEPTEMBER, 8:07PM
Your Three Kiitty (war) Korrespondents took advantage of a lull in the action, here, at the Three Kitty Kompound, to take a few days off to get more organized. We're back reporting, today, from the local M.A.S.H. unit. In the construction war, M.A.S.H. is the acronym for Mindless Asinine Subcontractor Hell.

Today, the Terrified, Tiresome, Tedious, Tentative, Talented, Tilesetter Tank Corps is starting their second successive solar cycle of sweat and struggle in seclusion in the suite selected for the supervisors of our strapping sanctuary (In other words, they are working in the master bath.) The battle against the evil empire erupted enthusiastically and energetically and has progressed purposefully and peacefully to this point. We have not perceived a possible projected point of peace but presume it probably will be in pending planetary phases. In military jargon, this means, "Don't ask; don't tell," when it will be done.

There is a new event this morning in the Three Kitty Kingdom. The rant of rain on the roof rapidly returned to rout the roudy residue of the region and decisively defeat the determined demon dust. However, this very victory may be vacuous as the mean marauders of mud mysteriously and maliciously mired the masses and felicitous feline footprints formed on the flooring and the further flat facades and faces that the furry feet fondled. We anxiously await the artifacts generated by the glorious and Generous Gutter Garrison. Also, scarce is the Staff Sargent of Screens whose subject structures will allow the fastidious Feline Forces to linger and loiter lazily al fresco in the ferocity of the fiercest forecast.

Last week, our Carpentry Heros, assisted by our Own General Contractor declared victory over both the hot tub decking and the fence surrounding the propane tank. Also, they finished fitting the furnace so now we have heated hydro in the homey hovel.

The Peevish, Pernicious, Peripatetic, Pitiful Plumbing Platoon isn't scheduled to arrive from their assignment with an alternate army of allied armed forces for the foreseeable future.

The Cheerless, Cruel, Cretinous Cabinetry Cavalry is currently considered to be coming this week to wave their wild and wonderful woodworked weapons of war.

For plenty of planetary periods, progress has been proven on providing low-power paths for our phone, PC's, performed pitch player (the stereo), and our plethera of other processors. Willy Wonka, our Weird Wiring Wizard, today, worked the woeful wires that are captured in the cabinet creating contiguous containerization of the kitty cuisine credenza and completing that chore.

Until next time, coming to you from the M.A.S.H. unit, your Three Kitty (war) Korrespondents, Blackie, Yoda and Wookie.

Day 560 - Part 14
FLASH!! DATELINE: POINT ARENA, CA; 11 SEPTEMBER, 8:19PM
We've had a couple of quiet days, here at the M.A.S.H. unit of the Three Kitty Korps. The Tedious, Tentative, Talented, Tilesetter Tank Corps completed a third day of doing battle with the evil empire of demonic disorganization, dasterdly dirt, and complete chaos. We await their return today. So far, the terrific tiles titillate our (decorating) tastebuds with field tiles of ice white and a border of cobalt blue accented with scenes of tropical fish swimming lazily past. The tilework is complete on the vanity and most of the shower walls.

The Causeless, Cheerless, Cruel, Cretinous Cabinetry Cavalry called (several times) to check minor measurements before moving their modern munitions to magnify the melee against the minions of the mindless morass. They might muster a materialization tomorrow - definitely next week.

We equally expect, tomorrow, an excursion from the Elegant Electrician's Epaulets to energize the enduring electrical effects before our personal electrical hero establishes his own command in another war.

Several of our readers have sent missives to the manager, here at the Three Kitty Korps, commenting on our very verbiage. We thank you for your comments as we very much enjoy the opportunity to obfuscate obstacles into the oblivion of outright obscurity while obviating the odd, otherwordly occurrences. (In other words, we're having fun with the language.)

Until tomorrow, coming to you from the M.A.S.H. unit, your Three Kitty (war) Korrespondents, Blackie, Yoda and Wookie.

Day 561 - Part 15
FLASH!! DATELINE: POINT ARENA, CA; 12 SEPTEMBER, 1:21PM
Things were really jumping this morning, here at the Three Kitty Konstruction M.A.S.H. unit. We had the Tentative, Talented, Tilesetter Tank Corps, the Cheerless, Cruel, Cretinous Cabinetry Cavalry, the Elegant Electrician's Epaulets and the ferocious FedEx supply truck were all here at the same time. The Talented Tank Corps is tidily tiptoeing its way through the meticulous and magnificently messy master bath. The Cabinetry Cavalry came to complete the composition of cabinetry in the butler's pantry so the Elegant Epaulets could enstall electric efflorescence inside. The FedEx ferry mandated a moniker mark on their mainframe to demonstrate its daily delivery.

With the afternoon off and the outdoor heat on, the humans are contemplating completing their coordination and control of chaos and proceeding to play at the proximal Pacific for the post meridian. (In other words, go to the beach for the afternoon.)

Until next week, your Three Kitty (war) Korrespondents, Blackie, Yoda and Wookie.

Day 566 - Part 16
FLASH!! DATELINE: POINT ARENA, CA; 17 SEPTEMBER, 5:46PM
This week, things are moving right along at the M.A.S.H. unit. The forces of evil, chaos and confusion recorded a big loss as the somewhat strange but strategic selections were finally settled and the terrible tactics tied up for the Peripatetic, Pitiful Plumbing Platoon to return to install the big and bulky bathtub in the meticulous and magnificently messy master bath. While the Pitiful Platoon and our Carpentry Heros (assisted by our Own General Contractor) muscled the ten ton tub into its proper parking place, the Talented Tilesetter Tank Corps were working on both the spacious and sunny shower (grouting the walls and preparing the floor) and the curiously complicated countertop in the gorgeous guest bath on the second floor.

The subject structures of the Staff Sergeant of Screens arrived yesterday and were immediately installed to allow the fastidious Feline Forces to linger and loiter lazily al fresco day or night.

We had expected the Chimerical, Causeless, Cheerless, Cruel, Cretinous Cabinetry Cavalry to appear today with their latest weapons for the battles against chaos, dust and disorganization. Alas, they must have been delayed at their special secret camp site. We anxiously await their next visit with cabinetry for the living room, pantry and some of the remaining kitchen items.

We are sorry to report that a new battle front has opened up, here at the M.A.S.H. unit. For the past few days, the riotous rodent raiders have been causing much mousey mayhem in both the barn and the crawlspaces below the house. Our Own General Contractor visited the crawlspace sites and devised a plan of attack. Serious screening has been placed in several devilish drains and the situation is being monitored daily (or nightly as the case may be). The marauding mayhem mousies and the riotous rodent raiderss are being captured unharmed, and, after a good meal of peanut butter, they are sent to a relocation camp deep in the woods. Your Three Kitty (war) Korrespondent, Blackie, has, on several occasions travelled directly to the front (in the crawl spaces) where she spends the entire day gathering information, evidence for any war crimes trials and generally hiding from all. Stay tuned for more on this battle.

While all this is happening, unpacking is still in progress. The boxes and other packing materials are being recycled (with the help of our realtor) to other war locations for other armies where packing and/or moving are in progress. Even as careful as we are, periodically the persistent peanut patrol has to patiently and purposefully pick up prodigious piles of profusely puffed plastic packing peanuts purported to be pervasively placed on platforms and pedestals. (In other words, we spill the styrofoam peanuts and are then picking them up for hours.)

Until tomorrow, your Three Kitty (war) Korrespondents, Blackie, Yoda and Wookie.

Day 567 - Part 17
FLASH!! DATELINE: POINT ARENA, CA; 18 SEPTEMBER, 2:40PM
The trio of clutter, disorganization and chaos led by none other than fearless frustration, suffered another loss as the Feline Forces, with the Causeless, Cheerless, Cruel, Cretinous Cabinetry Cavalry in the forefront, charged onward today with some new armament that arrived just as the previously established and now antiquated actions became increasingly aggravating and agonizingly awful. With the kitchen cabinetry almost complete, measurements were made (yet again) for the shelves in the laundry.

Meanwhile, in the meticulous and magnificently messy master bath, the Talented Tilesetter Tank Corps are pushing forward in the hope of finishing the shower floor.

While these forces were doing battle, a secret operative from the intelligence corps arrived at the M.A.S.H. unit to "debug" a defiant and definitely defective deep freeze. Unfortunately, he arrived too late to save the boisterous broccoli, cute carrots and lovely limes but, hopefully, this will save the the remaining civilian produce population who have been literally freezing to death in their own drawer.

The battle with the riotous rodent raiders still rages with the facile Feline Forces taking yet another prisoner this morning from the crawl space below the house. If the plan of attack implemented by our Own General Contractor is successful, we should have no more prisoners detained after the next few days. In the barn, things are different as one of the riotous rodent raiders is trying to gnaw its way INTO the building through the weatherstripping under the door. The hole becomes larger each day. We'll report progress from either side as it occurs.

Yet another battle front opened two days ago as a small leak was discovered in the furnace boiler. OH, NO, MR. BILL!!! The furnace seems to function flawlessly and it is located on a cement floor so the weeping of water is not worthy of worry but the manufacturer will be contacted for rightful repair or replacement. The Pitiful Plumbing Platoon will be called on to perform the purposeful patch-up.

Day 568 - Part 18
FLASH!! DATELINE: POINT ARENA, CA; 19 SEPTEMBER, 4:14PM
We apologize for not signing off yesterday. Our transmission was cut short as agents of chaos and confusion overcame the Three Kitty (war) Korrespondents. The Fearless Feline Forces are back today in fine fiddle and, while still at the M.A.S.H. unit, we are stronger than ever in our quest to defeat the evil empire and its minions of dust, disarray, chaos and confusion.

The Cheerless, Cruel, Cretinous Cabinetry Cavalry are rapidly becoming our heros. The wonderful woodworked weapons (the shelves and doors in the kitchen cabinetry and the large storage cabinet in the living room) that were MIA were recovered and installed this week. The forces of chaos, evil, dust and disarray did, however, counter-attack with a massive brain failure on the part of the glass supplier for the dish cabinet (for the kitchen). Despite all the information and intelligence imparted, the special glass for the doors was cut incorrectly and has to be rectified and recreated. Another 2 week delay (at least) is anticipated.

Our Tilesetter Tank Corps completed using copious capfuls of concrete and countless colorless (read that white) terrific tiny tiles to finally finish the floor of the spacious and sunny shower. He also completed the curiously complicated countertop in the gorgeous guest bath on the second floor. It is on to the tub surround in the meticulous and magnificently messy master bath next and finally the floor.

There is some news from the battle front with the riotous rodent raiders and the marauding mayhem mousies. The attack on the barn is continuing from both without and within as the weatherstripping is being withered and wiped out. A new weapon is planned to test if these enemy troops are from the planet of Munimula and are metal munching monsters.

We had anticipated the arrival of our Carpentry Heros and our Own General Contractor today. Unfortunately, they are still needed at a battle site of another war and will not be available to tackle our mountain of minutia until next week. At that time, a daring dumpster will appear and the much maligned moby mystic midden made up of a mindless morass, maintained from the melange of misused morsels and mixed manufactured miscellania will be rightfully removed.

Until next week, your Three Kitty (war) Korrespondents, Blackie, Yoda and Wookie.

Day 571 - Part 19
FLASH!! DATELINE: POINT ARENA, CA; 22 SEPTEMBER, 7:24PM
It is HOT here in the M.A.S.H. unit of the Three Kitty Kingdom. It is still 78 degrees F outside and, for the second successive solar cycle, there hasn't been even a hint - not even a molecule - not even an atom - of a breath of air. There are no Santa Ana winds - no sea breeze blowing - and no hummingbirds exhaling - nothing. At 8AM today the temperature was already at 80 degrees. We have heard from many reliable sources that this weather is unprecedented here on the normally mild, moderately breezy coast. We contacted the Three Kitty Klimatology people who used their special weather window. (Yes, it is the same window that the Three Kitty Kritter group uses to report on whale activity.) They saw no fog this evening - bad news again tomorrow.

So, with the local weather report completed, you, our dear readers, probably want some insight into the progress of the construction war. The Cruel, Cretinous Cabinetry Cavalry and the Talented Tilesetter Tank Corps were both at the Three Kitty Korps Headquarters today doing battle against the forces of evil, which were led by none other than continuously corrupt and criminal, chaos, itself. Great advances were made by the Feline Forces as the last of the living room cabinetry was installed and tiles were placed upon the face of the bright but bulging bathtub in the meticulous and magnificently messy master bath. The living room cabinetry can't be declared ready for habitation by the civilian population of audio/video equipment, however, as finish work is required. Our Carpentry Heros and our Own General Contractor are scheduled to return tomorrow from their mission at the alternate battle front. Upon their return, we anticipate the finish work to be completed with the customary consistency and competence and the cabinetry to be confirmed as under civilian control.

It looks like the secret operative from the intelligence corps did successfully "debug" the defiant and definitely defective deep freeze. The thermal readings have been reasonable and regular and the poor, puffy, polar produce hasn't displayed any dismal damage due to galloping glaciation.

The battle with the riotous rodent raiders and the marauding mayhem mousies is not going well. The Feline Forces have captured and released two more enemy troops after interrogation and a proper meal. Two additional enemy troops escaped capture. Yet another enemy agent, whose posting is believed to be with the RIA (Rodent Intelligence Agency), ran right past one of the human Kitty Korps personnel and into the barn in broad daylight - all this without even an attempt at a disguise. We fear that a special mighty munition might be mandatory.

Until tomorrow, your Three Kitty (war) Korrespondents, Blackie, Yoda and Wookie.

Day 572 - Part 20
FLASH!! DATELINE: POINT ARENA, CA; 23 SEPTEMBER, 3:38PM
The Three Kitty Klimatology Krew take great pleasure in reporting today that the temperature at 8:AM was 19 degrees cooler than it was yesterday. The thermal tempest has faded fantastically and has been replaced by galloping gusts off the wintry waters of the placid Pacific. The Klimatology Krew will be insufferably pleased with themselves for a few days as they take full credit for providing this positive pause from the previous pot-boiling period. We anticipate that fingerlings of felicitous fog might be flying furiously past the feline fortress before the end of the day.

Overall, it has been a good day for the Feline Forces. Our Own General Contractor and our Carpentry Heros arrived just after dawn to take on the evil empire in a myriad of minor melees. The newly woodworked weapons (that were previously developed and delivered by the Cruel, Cretinous Carpentry Cavalry) are being sealed in preparation for their use against the forces of dust, disorganization, chaos and clutter. The pillars on the portico of the Feline Fortress are being primed and painted to perfection. The Talented Tilesetter Tank Corps is moving right along, placing terrific tiles on the wall behind the two ton tub in the meticulous and magnificently messy master bath.

As the facade of fish (tiles) was being fastened to the walls, the Marshal of Mirrors motored majestically to the Feline Fortress with marvelous matching mirrors for each of our beforehand bare and bald bathrooms. Unfortunately, the forces of confusion and chaos also have infected our Mirror Marshal's mantle as the mirror for the meticulous and magnificently messy master bath has been manufactured and manicured mistakenly and has to be made once more.

We also had good news from the front in the battle with the riotous rodent raiders and the marauding mayhem mousies. Perhaps the threat of our special mighty munition must have sent them scurrying for safety away from the crawlspace below the house. For the first time in over a week, we did not capture any POW's for interrogation and release. Stay tuned, the Feline Forces will keep watch in the crawlspace for a few days and then it is on to the barn.

The best news of the day came from the County Colonel, Mr. Ed, who came out to confirm our continuous course. On behalf of the government factions, he signed the armistice (our Occupancy Permit) and the County is formally signaling defeat and surrender. The Three Kitty Kompound can now be officially occupied by carefree civilians, their courageous cohorts and fearless feline friends.

Until tomorrow, your Three Kitty (war) Korrespondents, Blackie, Yoda and Wookie.

NEWS FROM THE (CONSTRUCTION) BATTLE FRONT - PARTS 21 to 30

Day 573 - Part 21
FLASH!! DATELINE: POINT ARENA, CA; 24 SEPTEMBER, 4:42PM
The forces of chaos and confusion seem to have infected our Mindless Marshal of Mirrors to a much greater extent than previously perceived. They remanufactured the moby mirror for the meticulous and magnificently messy master bath only to find a mar in the mantle (a scratch in the surface). The damaged, deficient and defective device was their last in the demanded dimensions so they must discuss delivery with their dealer and a delay of days (7-10 to be exact) has been deduced and declared.

The Talented Tilesetter Tank Corps were our heros today. The tiles around the ten ton tub are complete and awaiting gobs of gooey grout tomorrow. Then it is on to the bathroom floor and then on to the slate in the front hall.

Today, our Carpentry Heros were once again posted here at the M.A.S.H. unit where they sealed the woodworked weapons in the kitchen and living room and they managed the maligned, moby, mystic midden, moving it mightily into the daring dumpster. Our Own General Contractor related some naughty and noxious news about our tidy towel bars and desirous doorstops. Disarray and disruption have attacked and overwhelmed the supplier of these wonderous weapons. The order is not scheduled to be shipped from Cleveland until later this week.

Further noxious news came from the Garonomous and Grim Gutter Garrison. Once again their appearance at the Feline Fortress has been fated to fade. Fortuitously, the forecast doesn't fortify floods in the foreseeable future.

There was good news today from the battle with the riotous rodent raiders and the marauding mahyem mousies. As the Feline Forces have, for a second day, had no POW's captured, the operation has now been moved into the barn and the crawlspace under the house has been declared firmly in feline paws.

Until next time, your Three Kitty (war) Korrespondents, Blackie, Yoda and Wookie.

Day 578 - Part 22
FLASH!! DATELINE: POINT ARENA, CA; 29 SEPTEMBER, 4:53PM
The past few days have yielded much progress against the evil forces of chaos, confusion, disorganization and the ultimate mastermind, insanity. Our Talented Tilesetter has completed the meticulous and magnificently messy master bath. It is still meticulous and magnificent but it is by no means messy. It now awaits the Pitiful Plumbing Platoon, the Elegant Electrician's Epaulets and (assuming they are past their infection of last week) the Mindless Marshal of Mirrors. It is currently unclear to your Korrespondents but our Carpentry Heros might need to be in the master bath also to install a bench and glass shelves in the shower as well as robe hooks, towel bars and a door stop. So, the inaugural celebration for the first shower and first flush will wait a several additional solar cycles.

In the front hall, the Talented Tilesetter also made great inroads with the slate tile that will grace the floor. Sadly, we might be saying farewell to the Talented Tilesetter by week's end.

The Carpentry Cavalry has been at the Three Kitty Kompound for the past two working solar cycles installing the bookshelves in the library. They estimate that in the next solar cycle, the library bookcases and the last cabinet for the pantry should be complete. After "sealing" by our Carpentry Heros, these mighty munitions should contribute greatly as we unpack many boxes and cause the forces of disorganization to flee the Feline Fortress forever.

We anticipate our Own General Contractor to be on the scene, here in the M.A.S.H. unit tomorrow. His current project is coloring the concrete in the sunroom and the screen porch. No mere paint, this stain is multi-hued and even has flow marks that look like primordial ooze. The process may be completed tomorrow with a sealer.

Over the weekend, the human inhabitants of the Three Kitty Kompound took to the forest, following an old deer trail on a part of their property that had been previously unexplored. They reported seeing a beautiful cluster of manzanita trees and a skeleton of a deer that was almost complete. They even found the remnants of an old marijuana "farm" that was abandoned years ago.

Until next time, your Three Kitty (war) Korrespondents, Blackie, Yoda and Wookie.

Day 580 - Part 23
FLASH!! DATELINE: POINT ARENA, CA; 01 OCTOBER, 9:23AM
The fearsome foursome of dirt, dust, disruption and despair mounted a major counter-offensive today against the fairly fatigued Feline Forces. The Carpentry Cavalry, while finishing the bookshelves in the library, brought with them their manic mischievous machinery to saw and sand their wonderful woodworked weapons of war. Despite the best defensive efforts of the Carpentry Cavalry, the manic mischievous machinery proceeded to invite the fearsome foursome into the Feline Fortress as they produced prodigious piles of puff and powder that scrambled and scattered and secured locations throughout both the upstairs and the downstairs - even on the walls. (There was sawdust throughout the house.) The Three Kitty Kleaning Krew is not amused.

The Talented Tilesetter is now about 2/3 done with the front hall where he is laying slabs of spectacular slate that is filigreed with fine fossils.

Further progress was made with coloring the concentration of concrete in the sunroom and the screen porch. More work is scheduled for today.

Until next time, your Three Kitty (war) Korrespondents, Blackie, Yoda and Wookie.

Day 582 - Part 24
FLASH!! DATELINE: POINT ARENA, CA; 03 OCTOBER, 8:00AM
Today the Talented Tilesetter Tank Corps will finish the fabulous front foyer which will finally finish the floors. All that will be left is a small cabinet in the kitchen that needs 4 granite tiles. There was a great deal of dynamic discussion, here, at the M.A.S.H. unit during the past couple of days, over what granite tile to use. A new granite with a great green/gray color has been found in the same patterning as the original brown/tan granite that is throughout the kitchen. The new tile will lend a harmonious hue to the kitchen and will completely complement the friendly family room fireplace and the growing groups of greenery that are already stationed at their posts throughout the area.

Yesterday, the M.A.S.H. unit was remarkably rife with amazingly acute activity and particularly pleasing pandemonium that bordered on completely controlled chaos. Our Carpentry Heros reassembled the trim around the windows in the library. The evil forces of disruption and disorganization (assisted by the manic, mischievous machinery) forced the Cabinetry Cavalry to recently remove the elegant edging to facilitate the fitting and fixing of the bookshelves. Our Carpentry Heros also installed the trim on the top of the tile that the Talented Tilesetter Tank Corps had just tucked. The second division of our Carpentry Heros was also at work finishing the wonderful woodworked weapons of war in both the literary library and the luscious laundry.

Meanwhile, our General Contractor was attacking the massive mountain of minutia and daunting degree of details that remain in our battle to complete the Kitty Kompound.

The Grim Gutter Garrison gingerly gamboled over the faces of the Feline Fortress while fastening their fixtures with great facility. They are scheduled to return today.

The Cabinetry Cavalry completed the culinary cache of cabinetry today. It should be fully ready for combat by tomorrow when the glue hardens.

Until next time, your Three Kitty (war) Korrespondents, Blackie, Yoda and Wookie.

Part 25
FLASH!! DATELINE: POINT ARENA, CA; 03 OCTOBER, 4:18PM
There is joyous celebration today at both the Three Kitty Kompound Headquarters and, here, at the M.A.S.H. unit. The Talented Tilesetter Tank Corps fixed the final flat finish on the fabulous front foyer floor. It is grouted and needs only to be sealed on Monday. On Monday, the great green/gray granite will also be grouted as it was placed perfectly this post meridian.

The Painting Patrol of our Carpentry Heros were here finishing the sealing of the wonderful woodworked weapons in both the library and the laundry room. The forces of evil are really on the run now. There are two days of weekend ahead when the denizens of disorganization and dispair will be rightfully routed from the Fabulous Feline Fortress. There must be 20 book boxes that can have their residents released to their respective rooms. We can't wait to begin.

The Gutter Garrison is once again gingerly gamboling over the faces of the Feline Fortress. They hope to complete the attachment of their artifacts this afternoon.

The Marshal of Mirrors managed the mounting of the mirror in the meticulous and magnificent (but not messy) master bath. We now anxiously await the Elegant Electrician's Epaulets and the Pitiful Plumbing Platoon for completion.

Tomorrow ante meridian, we meet with the Lovely Landscaping Legion to proceed with the process of protecting the soil from erosion and prettying up our place, plot and play areas. We hope the Landscaping Legion can place paths and ponds and provide organic material.

Until next week, your Three Kitty (war) Korrespondents, Blackie, Yoda and Wookie.

Day 586 - Part 26
FLASH!! DATELINE: POINT ARENA, CA; 07 OCTOBER, 9:42PM
Your Three Kitty (war) Korrespondents were in the thick of the battle action this morning before dawn as Yoda sniffed out a tiny scout that had been sent behind the piano by the riotous rodent raiders and the marauding mayhem mousies. Only his tail was visible as the evil rodent raiders launched a major second offensive. Wookie and Blackie assisted the Three Kitty Kaptors as they detained the tiny scout and, after proper interrogation, released it into the brushpile where several of his confederates are known to frequent.

Our Carpentry Heros were here at the M.A.S.H. unit this afternoon installing doorstops, towel bars and paper holders in the bathrooms. On one occasion, one of our Carpentry Heros and our Own General Contractor were found standing on the kitchen countertop installing the stainless steel sheath on the cooktop rangehood. It was glued and taped and we'll know in the morning if this effort to defeat the ugly, unfinished unit were successful.

We said adieu to our Talented Tilesetter Tank Corps today as the last of the tile was sealed and the last of the grout lines were cleaned. We shall miss our long conversations about the local air corps (He's a birdwatcher.)

Until next time, your Three Kitty (war) Korrespondents, Blackie, Yoda and Wookie.

Day 586 - Part 27
FLASH!! DATELINE: POINT ARENA, CA; 09 OCTOBER, 10:53AM

MARAUDING MAYHEM MOUSIES RETAKE CRAWLSPACE !!

Yes, there is much sadness and consternation here at the M.A.S.H. unit as the riotous rodent raiders and the marauding mayhem mousies have retaken the crawlspace under the house. Yesterday, Blackie in a totally impulsive and selfless act, without any regard for her life or personal safety, climbed the ladder and dove headfirst into what is now enemy territory. After gathering appropriate intelligence, she returned safely. Her efforts were amply rewarded with generous portions of kitty kibble. Later yesterday, our Own General Contractor accompanied by one of our Carpentry Heros also ventured behind enemy lines to plug some small holes where the house meets the concrete foundation. The situation will be monitored daily.

The progress of our Carpentry Heros over the past couple of days has generated mixed reviews. The doorstops are all installed, now, as are most of the towel bars etc. in the bathrooms. Some of the bathroom accessories were not available so they await some future visit of our Carpentry Heros when they are again posted to the Feline Fortress.

Efforts to install the sheath on the cooktop rangehood were unsuccessful and additional secret weapons will be required. The efforts to date did, however, generate some interesting audio effects as periodically during night the wooden pieces (that were taped into place to keep tension on the sheath) would lose their grip and come crashing to the floor. One piece took direct aim at one of your Three Kitty (war) Korrespondents who artfully and agilely ambled away.

We said farewell yesterday to the Glorious Gutter Garrison who completed installation of their wonderful weapons of copper. Only time (and the first rains) will tell if their munitions will be successful.

Today we await a return visit from the secret operative from the intelligence corps to help save our precious produce from a frozen death in the defiant and definitely defective deep freeze. Hopefully this time he will be successful. We also await our Own General Contractor who, once again, has promised to come and seal the stained concrete in the sunroom and screened porch.

Until next time, your Three Kitty (war) Korrespondents, Blackie, Yoda and Wookie.

Day 592 - Part 28
FLASH!! DATELINE: POINT ARENA, CA; 13 OCTOBER, 8:39AM
The fiendish forces of freezing overpowered the secret operative sent last week from the intelligence corps to help save our precious produce in the defiant and definitely defective deep freeze. After contacting his HQ technical support, he promised a return late this week with a mighty munition and a technical note on its use.

The Peripatetic, Pitiful Plumbing Platoon returned to the Three Kitty Kingdom last week to perform plumbing practice in the master bath. Unfortunately corps of chaos and detail of disorganization have taken a firm hold on all the plumbing personnel so this Pitiful Platoon didn't have the proper parts to put in place and those that could be furnished were frotzed due to former failures.

We haven't seen our Own General Contractor for several days. We hope his absence is due to his leadership being required at another battle site. His return to the Feline Fortress will, hopefully, indicate the sealing of the concrete in the sunroom and the screened porch. After subsequent clean-up, those spaces will be declared secured and safe for civilian porch furniture and the massive mountain of mistreated houseplants that have been humbly hibernating in their hovels.

We also await a visit today from the Elegant Electrician's Epaulets who are scheduled to install the last lumenizers in the lavatories and the electrical outlets in the library and the living room cabinet. These areas can then be inhabited by toothbrushes and towels (in the bathrooms) and books, games and other civilian miscellania in the other areas.

The battle with the riotous rodent raiders and the mischievous marauding mayhem mousies drags on. To date, since retaking the crawlspace from the fearless feline forces, 4 of the silly small subversives have been captured, interrogated, given a good meal and released to the critter condo that might serve as their headquarters and hiding place. (In other words, we've taken 4 mice to the brushpile that is halfway to the meadow.) We'll keep you informed of progress on this front. With winter coming (and with the reproduction rate of mousies), we anticipate a long war.

Until next time, your Three Kitty (war) Korrespondents, Blackie, Yoda and Wookie.

Day 596 - Part 29
FLASH!! DATELINE: POINT ARENA, CA; 17 OCTOBER, 12:20PM
If you are getting tired of reading these epics, think of us; we're writing them. The good news is that both the Elegant Electrician's Epaulets and the Pitiful Plumbing Platoon have finished their insane, integral installations. Only "punch list" items remain for them.

The better news is that the riotous rodent raiders and marauding mayhem mousies haven't had any of their tiny troops taken prisoner in the past 2 days. Only time (and a renewed supply of peanut butter on the Havahart trap) will tell if victory can be declared. The need for victory is strengthened by the fact that the use of peanut butter for the war effort is beginning to seriously impact the provisioning of the mess hall with PB & J sandwiches - not to mention peanut butter cookies for our Carpentry Heros.

The bad news is that once again our Own General Contractor has delayed completion of the range hood in the kitchen. The stainless steel shroud is installed and staying stuck spiffily. However, the edges have to be secured and sealed. This is scheduled in several solar cycles.

Our Own General Contractor did come today to finish sealing the sunroom and the screened porch. During this visit, he became aware that the forces of dirt, disruption and their ultimate weapon, insanity, had infected some unnamed member of his Feline Forces. The evidence left at the scene of the crime (the guest suite) was the wallboard bits and wallboard dust that had been dumped into a previously clean toilet. This was the second such surprise "toilet attack" that had been perpetrated upon the Three Kitty Kingdom. The Fearless Feline Forces will have to be more vigilant in the future. Our own General Contractor has agreed to assist with guard duty to help prevent future attacks.

The magnificent (but not messy) master bath, the scene of many pitched battles over the past 2+ months has finally been declared secured and safe for habitation by tidy towels, silly soapdishes and tactical toothbrushes. After special scrubbing, the bright, but bulging, bathtub was also declared firmly in Feline paws and served for a sumptuous, sultry soak last soir. The stupendous shower is awefully awesome with space to spread human appendages, sun to see by and fishy friends (on the walls) to keep humans kompany.

We look forward on Monday to the removal of the mobile monstrosity that has been moored and mired at the Feline mainland for most of 24 months. (Read that the trailer that has been used as a construction office is scheduled to depart on Monday.) The landscape will look little-known without it.

Until next week, from the M.A.S.H. unit, your Three Kitty (war) Korrespondents, Blackie, Yoda and Wookie.

Day 603 - Part 30
FLASH!! DATELINE: POINT ARENA, CA; 24 OCTOBER, 3:48PM
You probably have been wondering whether your Three Kitty (war) Korrespondents were sent on some secret scouting stint or perhaps had been cruely captured. Well, we haven't reported this week as there has been nothing notably newsworthy to narrate. We have had a quiet week.

The battle with the riotous rodent raiders and the marauding mayhem mousies is winding down. In another couple of days (with continued lack of POW captures), we shall (once again) declare victory in the crawlspace below the house. Your Kitty Korrespondent, Blackie, did perform a reconnaissance deep into enemy territory several solar cycles ago and reported back that none of the small yet fastidious furry foes were found. Perhaps they have given up this territory in favor of the brushpile halfway to the meadow.

Our Own General Contractor worked once again today on the stainless steel shroud that is installed and staying stuck over the stove. He is hesitant to declare victory here before the glue glues, the epoxy epoxys, the grout grouts and he can see the shroud in its spiffy sum and totally dry.

The removal of the mobile monstrosity, the tauny twenty ton trailer, occurred this morning. It took much moaning and motionless mettle on the part of our Own General Contractor, his tiny truck and our Carpentry Heros to get the beleaguered behemoth beginning its journey. For now it is moored and mired near the mouth of the driveway from where it can be moved with minimal mess.

Of interest, albeit not immediately related to the construction war, is the convention of Fruit Flies that began in the past couple of days. Local wisdom tells that every year between the middle of October and the beginning of November, when there is virtually no wind, the Fruit Flies congregate in great swarms, like a shoals of fish or flocks of birds, to share DNA as they procreate. If you walk into one of these whirlwinds of flies, the swarm parts to let you through. The Black Phoebe (a bird of the flycatcher family) took up residence here at the Three Kitty Kingdom about 2 weeks ago. Now we know why.

Until we meet again, from the Three Kitty Kompany Korporate Headquarters, your Three Kitty (war) Korrespondents, Blackie, Yoda and Wookie.

Planning Phase: July, 2000 - Feb., 2002

Building Phase: Mar., 2002 - Oct., 2003

Finishing Up: October, 2003 -

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